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[mistericeman]

As above....
Many of us (myself including) walk with a black dog for company....
Thankfully these days having to "keep quiet and pull yourself together" is becoming less of an acceptable answer...

Speaking personally one of my biggest steps forward was to learn to recognise the onset of the down slope.... And accept that following that would be the return to 'normality' (or close to)

Remember that there's plenty of others out there that live with the day to day/week to week/year to year roller-coaster ride that goes with regular wander with black dog at our heels.... Sometimes the *&%^$ just runs off ahead.....

Stick with it AND with us chap.....

We'd miss your varied stories and no mistake.

[w3526602]

Hi All,

I showed Barbara some of your posts (she was having trouble scrolling down).

She said "Any more tears, and I'll pull your plug!" I'm not sure what she meant.

I'm now in a quandry - don't know what to do." I'll brood on it.

Yes, I too can feel the Dark Place getting closer. I can usually "gird my loins", and fight it off. But sometimes it sneaks up on me while I'm not looking. I think a good win on Lotto would help ...    ... not that money is a worry. Just winning £0.50 would be a boost.

Hey, this forum should be available on the NHS. Can anybody take that further, like BLACK DOG.com

Thankyou everybody,

602

Hey! I'm about to post a mail, which must mean something.

[scotty]

Hi John  I’ve just read this and felt I had to say something, please please please don’t sign off I for one really enjoy you’re posts they are informative funny and they make me smile whenever I read them (apart from this one) you would be sorely missed, please reconsider, this forum is a very friendly forum and if one or two people have an issue then as has been mentioned a post doesn’t have to be viewed just scroll on past  I certainly will look forward to reading you’re next story      Paul Tash n Barney

[genocache]

John,

     One thing I've realized since I got older, I just had my half birthday and yes having a half birthday is once again important, that life is short and I no longer worry about not being able to speak my mind.

   Now like a lot of peoples I've had a good/*&%^$ life and never had to deal with depression until a few years back and I didn't even know I was in it. Heck, my employer had closed down and I was jobless, etc. All I had was a *&%^$ Land Rover project that kept using up what little savings I had. All legitimate reasons to be bummed. Took me over a year to figure out I was not just bummed but depressed as thoughts of suicide crept in and out of my darker thoughts.
    The welcoming feel of this and the Guns and Rovers forums have been bright spots for me to come and feel useful. You have been very kind to me off the forum in our business transactions and I too enjoy your stories, although I got to admit I have to gooooooooooooooogle some of the terms you use. Never heard of Winston's black dog until this morning or a Bloodhound missile.
     Now I'm not a drinker or doper, I'm a Series 2 Owner. When things go south I gird my loins and keep the rig chugging along. That black smoke is not my mood it's a diesel!
   Keep the faith bro!

[geoff]

 John have I upset you    I hope not 

 If so it was not intentional !

 You should keep the plug firmly engaged 

[lurch032003]

Hi john ,
Nit only do I agree with all everyone has said -don’t go- I must stress strongly that you stay, not only is it important that guys like you stay and post on or off topics it’s what makes this club so great it’s not all nuts bolts and springs or what bolt stud goes where.
I find your posts great reading and have enjoyed them all my time as a member through my times stuck in hospital reading every post going it was good to always find one from yourself not because that I share same first name or your dog my last name lol
It was because you have a world of knowledge that would be sadly missed.
Yes I too am medically retired and understand some of the challenges and sympathise with some you have gone through. But please stay even to just pop in now and then, pass a comment or advice and when you ready to post a topic again folk like me will be looking forward to having a good read, forget the doom sayers folk who dint agree or just want to disagree for sake of it to them you ignore if they have reason not to like a post by you or anyone then to them say nothing don’t read it it like a tv program if u don’t like it change channel but john don’t let them tell you or make you feel that you are not liked or unwanted as fir say every one of them there’s a thousand folk here who do like u and enjoy your posts and fir that reason alone please stay .
John . W. With my black cocker Spaniard who can’t spell or punctuate lol
 

[sharkojoints]

Only just seen this thread, but I agree with everyone else.

Stay here, and post therapeutically. There are plenty of nice people on this forum - let's face it, nasty people don't tend to be into ancient Land Rovers - and I enjoy your anecdotes and life story as much as everyone else!

If you haven't already, find a GP you like and trust for a chat, perhaps? Look after yourself 

[w3526602]

Hi everybody,

Oh ****! The tears are here again.

This reminds me of an incident, years ago, I can't remember what/when, I just remember I had taken a hell of a bang ... and the tears started.
A mate said "I'll get help!" and was about to dash off.

"It's OK ... sob ... its only... sob ... shock ... sob!"

Hmmm!  That can only have been the time, riding pedal cycle, probably about 30mph, and looked over my shoulder. When I looked back, the road had narrowed, with an unlit lamp post right in front of me. I don't remember the impact at all, probably unconcious before the signals hit my brain.

I think I was concussed for about the first week, after which puberty (OK, I was 16) and a ward full of student nurses, took over, for the next two months, before being discharged in a hip-spiker and a pair of crutches. Once the plaster was off, but before I could bend my knee, I used to strap my crutches over my shoulder, and ride my polo-bike - fixed wheel, no brakes, and VERY low geared, using only one pedal, to Croydon General for physio-therapy.

Er ... if anybody in Kiwi knows a Nurse Rita nee Penfold, please pass her my regards. I was her first experience with an enema.  But not mine ...Mum was a nurse.

"Nil iligitimo carburundum" ... if anybody here understands pidgin Latin.

602

PS,

"Don't let those without fathers grind you down!

PPS

Sharkojoints. I knew web had a doctor we could talk to when he referred the "the brown stuff hitting the fan", but in fluent Royal Navy

[Porkscratching]

Nice to see you back 602..
Croydon General was the first hospital i ever got taken to as well, age 5 or so..I'd put my hand on top of a (lighted) Valor paraffin heater...

[Gylo]

Hi John
I have for the past three years been really I'll , depression being a side illness associated
With what else I have .The quack's have finally started to sort out my medications and
This summer the family and myself have started to get back into land rovers , we have
Attended some shows Wareham ,Petworth etc and so far so good, I woke up some mornings and just used to cry and cry but I could not tell you why. On these dark days
I sit in front of the computer and the series 2 forum pure escape ! One of the few things
I used to like was the reminiscences of a bloke called w3526602 and his stories about
South Croydon and purley which I can relate to, if he were to disappear it would be very
Sad.
Sad.

[w3526602]

Oh ****!

the tears are here again   and then I start shaking shuddering. I presume we've all been there. At least I do it quietly.

Before I signed on a few minutes ago, I had decided to ask if I can stay. I know you have all told me to, but once more would be wonderful ... I'm not used to that sort of approbation (assuming there is such a word)

Of course, getting back to where I was before, will be a different matter ... and maybe  not the prime objective

I'm truly sorry I distressed everybody, it's the last thing I would have wanted.

602 (the Wuss)

PS. Barbara's operation has been cancelled, which is distressing. She's a tough cookie, but this is beating her down. Does anybody know what it costs to go private?

PPS. The Jiminy failed it's MOT, probably a few hundred to fix, (not a problem) or might be worth £3,000 trade in against a new car, without the MOT.

PPPS. The above two are probably mutually exclusive.

[Porkscratching]

Shame about Barbara's op, a friend is due a hand op, and they keep cancelling it, it's what they do it seems, I'm sure it'll come round in the end, tho not really satisfactory is it?.. I'd think private stuff like that'd be a small fortune tbh, depends how minted you are ! ..worth going that route if you are tho, on the basis "you can't take it with you" !
Anyway, once again, nice to see you back dear sir...!

[w3526602]

Hi Peter,

Assuming I asked the right question, Google say a private knee replacement will cost £10,000 to £12,000. I wonder if the NHS would go halves?

They were going to fund it all, but there seemed to be some concerns about her needing constant observation, so she had to be in a multi-bed ward with a nurse doing the Times crossword at the table in the middle of the ward. (Has anybody read The Nun's Story?

OK, we can find more than £12,000, at short notice, a 3%. Which SWMBO will refuse to draw. 

What about a nurse sitting in a private room, watching Barbara peeling grapes, at our expense? I'd expect a couple of Grand per week should cover that.

602

602

[Porkscratching]

Tbh mate, I'd think the best way forward initially would be see her consultant, and say " look this is getting ridiculous, we're willing to look at some private solution, what do you suggest?.. what arrangement can we come to ?"
I'm sure most consultants do private and have all the right contacts...worth seeing what they can come up with..maybe even a 'go halves' type deal..

[genocache]

602,

    I don't know anything about the NHS, but I'd suggest that Barbara just go to the Dr in a borrowed wheel chair and tell him she just can't walk any more and that you have to carry her to the toilet at night, It might help if she was wearing some adult diapers and showed him saying she just can't make it to the toilet in time.
    Over here they don't want to do anything until they HAVE TO, just show them that HAVE TO is now.

Have you checked into how much a vacation in Mexico with surgery costs? I don't know about knee surgery but some folks from here go for cheaper dental costs and other stuff.